Pain

Hi,

I wanted to briefly discuss pain. What is pain for me? It is a feeling that is driven by various factors that can either be physical or mental. The physical pain one may face, can either be physical abuse from another person, or one you inflict on yourself, it can be a physical diability that greives you, physical pain can also be a result from your shortcomings, the most important type of pain however is the mental one. Mental pain is by far the greatest form of suffering humans have to face. When we are kids, they teach us "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me" as children our mentality is not yet great enough to grasp that this statement is rather futile really, we as children realise that everything we can witness with our eyes is existent and everything that we cannot see is non existent, thus the physical pain we come across maybe shown to us through a bruise, a cut, bleeding etc, making us aware of the pain. Mental pain however at that age is not really familiar to us so widely, we may feel slightly down or upset at the words thrown at us, however as long as we cannot see the pain, we move on. Now if we went about like children and used that mentality then im sure you would agree life would be a little more cheerier for us. However, unfortunately and i say this with a smile, thats not quite what it really is. What exactly is mental pain? This is Something that is driven by certain factors that involve, name calling, betrayal, mistrust, abuse of trust, lonliness, the list can go on. Things that we lack, or we are unable to connect with allow us to greive. Realisation of the truth allows us to greive (and beleive you me, the truth is last thing we want to hear sometimes, and i want to go into this further in another post i hope quite soon!). What is pain for me? I do not like to describe my own suffering or pain, because i feel that it will make my post biased, but for me i would say that the greatest pain would be inflicted on me through those that i truly love, who i feel let me down in some way or the other. Now the reason that drove me to write this post was that i had committed a gravely wrong act of "eavsdropping", something i do not usually do, however i had good reason to commit such an act, i remember now the arabic proverb: "whoever involved himself in that which does not concern him, saw something that does not appeal to him", in this case the eavsdropping was because i knew the talk was about me, and i wanted to hear it. I want to talk about various moral acts in another post too quite soon. Anyhows, back to the line, the feeling of being let down, and hearing someones true opinion of me, voiced to one other than me, struck as something quite big for me. To acknowledge the truth of what someone really thinks about you, but has not made you think this, can actually blur your mind. Not only that, but if you were to hear lets say a conspiracy against you, how would you feel? Unable to walk on you feet? precisely.

So.. back to the discussion. Pain. How do we usually treat this? I would usually say crying. To cry silently to yourself is the best method of releiving pain. It gives you that mental releif for a short while, something you need. Many people like to be comforted while they are going through difficult times, but others, like myself, like to be left alone. For me i find it hard to beleive that one other than your own self can actually feel your pain unless they are sharing it or experiencing it. Usually i feel that there is a question of curiosity or concern. Are people curious to know about what you are going through? Or are they genuinely concerned?

People can love you, but my arguement is that, this is not usually enough for them to connect with your pain.

I think this post has yet again been quite lengthy.

Maryam