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Thursday, September 07, 2006

Bride to be

Bride to be
Blissfully
Inviting people
Happily
Step by step
She will see
Life with
Groomy
Is meant to be
one step
taken
to join a new life
It may prove
to be
quite a strife
Nerves are cracking
more and more
head is hurting
feet are sore
confusion confusion
it leaves her like this
half content
the other half clinging
to what she will miss.
She loves her life
just the way it is
Shes scared of cahnge
and moving to his.
The happy day nears
shes more broken than ever
All ahe can do
is engage in prayers
that her life with her partner
will be happy
and last forever.

I wont let you be the voice inside my head

I wont let you be the voice inside my head
I wont let you speak on behalf of me.
I wont live in fear that my actions I'll dread
I wont let you win and smile gleefully.

I hate the echoes that murmer inside
I hate the negativity that surrounds my soul
I hate having to fear you and having to hide
I hate losing to you, scoring a goal

You spit your posion at me too much
But I will stand on my feet this time
My life should not continue as such
For I have not committed any crime

You take advantage of my weak states
You use the times when I'm tired
You think I will develop your traits
But to you I am not wired.

I will overcome the battle of the self.
I will rid all inside me of your evil.
You are the lost one with no place on the shelf
I will enter paradise and you not. Devil.

Monday, August 14, 2006

Deal with it

I believe that a person must always put his or her self assessment at the top of the list of things to do in a day. It should always be a priority. Many faults we find in others are also partly due to ourselves, if we were only more understanding and considerate we wouldnt be in huffs and puffs over how people treated us.

When people are agitated or moody, we should understand that maybe something is on their mind as oppose to taking personal offence and thinking its something to do with us. Many people become paranoid when their partners behave weirdly, and usually become sensitive.

Its maybe not so much of a good idea to always have witty comments ready to fire out at your partner, in an aggressive attacking manner. Its not nice for them to feel intimidated or patronised by you. You should always allow comfort between urselves so u r partner can open up to you..

How to be a good wife - I think this is the best guideline to follow and I hope we women can all do that

1. Have dinner ready: Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal - on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him, and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed.

2. Prepare yourself: Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your makeup, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.

3. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys, paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift, too.

4. Prepare the children: Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces if they are small, comb their hair, and if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.

5. Minimize the noise: At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of washer, dryer, dishwasher or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet. Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile and be glad to see him.

6. Some Don'ts: Don't greet him with problems or complaints. Don't complain if he's late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day.

7. Make him comfortable: Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and unwind.

8. Listen to him: You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.

9. Make the evening his: Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment; instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to be home and relax.

10. The goal: Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can relax.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

The fear of feeling

We desire to find the path to inner peace, joy and freedom. We strive to feel lovable, worthy and secure. We know that if we do our inner work and open to our spiritual connection, we will feel all of that. Yet we often resist doing our inner work. This article discusses the feelings we are afraid to feel, because we are not sure we can manage them, so we turn to our addictions instead of turning to our spiritual guidance. We desire to find the path to peace, joy and freedom. We strive to feel lovable, worthy and secure. We know that if we do our inner work and open to our connection with Spirit, we will feel all of that. Yet we don't. We put off dialoguing for days or weeks. We stay stuck in our misery or numbness. Why? What are we so afraid of if we open to learning about loving?
I have searched for many years for the answer to this question. Over and over I would find myself out of grace and joy and into anxiety and stress. Each time it was because I failed to take care of myself in some way.
The problem is that all feelings are in the same box. Pain is in the same box as joy. We cannot be putting a lid on pain without putting a lid on joy as well.
What is the pain we are striving so hard to avoid feeling? Most people feel a lot of pain. We feel anxious, frightened, depressed, hurt. Since we are often in pain, it doesn't seem to make sense that we are, at the same time as we are feeling all this pain, also avoiding pain. Yet that is exactly what we are doing.
As unhappy as we may be feeling, we are avoiding pain that we believe is even greater than the pain we are feeling.
I have discovered that there are three feelings which most people want to avoid at all cost: aloneness, loneliness and helplessness over others.
Aloneness is what we feel inside when we are disconnected from God. Loneliness is what we feel when we cannot connect with another, either because our heart is closed, their heart is closed, or both of our hearts are closed. Helplessness is what we would feel if, when we want to connect with another and his or her heart is closed, we accept that there is nothing we can do to make them open their heart.
When we were babies and small children, we could not allow ourselves to feel these feelings. We could not have handled them and may have died of despair. So we learned many protections to avoid feeling these feelings.
The problem is that we still think we will die if we feel these feelings, so we are still avoiding them. We avoid connecting with God for fear God will not be there and we will feel alone. We get angry, withdraw, eat, drink, take drugs, watch TV, get busy, overwork and and indulge in many other addictions to avoid feeling the pain of our loneliness and helplessness.
Yet loneliness in our society is unavoidable. So many people spend their lives with their hearts closed to avoid their pain that it is impossible not to be around people whose hearts are closed some of the time. If we choose to avoid feeling our loneliness and helplessness, then we too will close our heart. However, when we close our heart we close down the joy too. Then we are stuck with the anxiety, fear, depression and hurt that is endemic in our society.
You will not die if you open to feeling your loneliness and helplessness. It is even quite tolerable if you hold your lonely Child while bringing through love from God, for then you are not alone in your loneliness. The willingness to feel the pain of loneliness and helplessness opens the door to joy, peace, and freedom. The more you open to God in your loneliness, the more you are able to embrace the privilege of this sacred journey of evolving your soul. There is great joy in the journey, even when there is loneliness!

Pervamania

This is a topic that I have been wanting to speak about for a long time. The streets of London are full of perverted sick minded individuals who like to take advantage of and exploit weaker members of society. These ill minded beings spend their malicious moments cunningly thinking up so called strategic plans to pounce on their preys. They wait for the best moments, to try and reach their revolting aims.

According to the BCS self-completion survey in 2001, 2% of women aged 16-59 were subject to less serious sexual assault and 0.5 percent to serious sexual assault during the year prior to interview. 0.3% of women reported they had been raped in the last year. Among men, 0.2 per cent were subject to any form of sexual assault during the year prior to interview. Seven per cent of women had suffered a serious sexual assault at least once in their lifetime (including rape) since the age of 16. 1.5% of men had suffered a serious sexual assault since the age of 16, with 0.9% reporting rape.

Read more here:
Domestic violence, sexual assault and stalking
Rape and sexual assault of women
Crime in England and Wales 2004/05

These files are in Adobe pdf format you need Adobe Reader to view them.

Mohammad Reza Sharifi's work

Mohammed Reza Sharifi

Mohammad Reza Sharifi was born in 1970 in Isfahan. Like all the other artists, he was interested in drawing by paperand pencil and after spending elementary and secondary school he made it to art school in Isfahan. Historical buildings and traditionalhistoric spaces of Isfahan motived him to work on miniature.At the Art school he became interested in works of Reza Abassy andgradually Mahmoud Farshchian, the great Iranian artist After graduationfrom Art school with grade A, he was accepted in the university, in theart field and became familiar with methods and classic modesexperiences and after graduation from university he spent his timeprofessors and galleries like Farshchian. His argument and associated with modern artists opened new horizonsto establish his pictures. He was motivated by art experts to publish the Album "Lost Secret". It is necessary to say this Album is a bit of his works and most of hisworks because of his personal mentality and ambiguity and contrasts ofcommunication with others has not been published and kept in privatecollection. During this 16 years working on drawing he succeeded to hold more than 30 exhibitions individually and in group, and createdalmost 200 everlasting pictures. Each of these exhibitions was acceptedby many people who like art from different parts of the world. Each of his pictures shows his creative mind and is like a thick bookthat each page of it has many secrets and mysteries. His technic is to create Acrylic and Rose complexion pictures onmockets with 2 m.m thickness. His pictures are complect. He hasnot used elementary drawing and scace and directly use his powerfulfeeling and painting his works. The works presented at this exhibition are the result of experience and investigation into various Iranian and European styles which relate the personality of elements to the immersions of the painter and are considered as means of communication with respectable beholdersand art lovers.

Creation





Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Interview with the buddhist Ashita

Ashita a 34 year old buddhist woman is currently doing her MA at Imperial University. She is a devout Buddhist from South Tailand, a woman passionate about life, and determined to drive herself towards her goals. Her aims are clear and her attempts are presise. Upon meeting this remarkable individual, we got into a discussion about faith and religion. She questioned me, and so I questioned her. This is how the interview went.

Ashita: Did you choose to wear the headscarf yourself? I know some people are forced.

M.Hilli (me): Yes it is a personal choice, I am not forced into it, I believe that it is an act of modesty, and I am fully comfortable with it. Although no one is protected from the evil eyes of an on-looker I believe that a woman covering her private parts and the most attractive features she owns is less likely to be looked at by perverted men than a woman who is revealing all her flesh. Although Hijab in its self is not solely for this purpose, from my personal experience I feel that it protects me in 101 ways. I am currently working in an environment inhabited by Arab men who are sick in the head, and with all the covering I uptake I am still looked at in a sick manner, and that makes me feel uncomfortable and nervous, yet it also relieves me to know that I am not exposed to these malicious creatures.

Ashita: Yeah you do have a valid point and I understand and respect you for it. Do you always dress in this same manner?

M.Hilli: [laughs slightly] No No No.. please do not look at the scruffily way I have dressed today, I am usually more elegant, but this morning I was very tired and so I made no attempt.

Ashita: I would love to see you looking elegant, I cant imagine how that can be achieved with Hijab.

M.Hilli: Why not? Maybe one day.

Ashita: I was wondering, when do you find time to do other stuff if you have to always pray? I mean I dont think I would be able to do that ever.

M.Hilli: Well the truth is we only pray 5 times a day and in 3 intervals. We combine 2 sets of 2 and one which is around dawn is prayed by itself. Its not as hard or as time consuming or even tedious as it may sound or seem, in fact all 5 prayers combined together do not take more than 20 minutes of your whole 24 hours in a day!!

Ashita: In Tailand I always see people praying alot.

M.Hilli: There are Muslims I believe in Tailand who wear Hijab is that true?

Ashita: Yes it is. Mostly in South Tailand where I was born. I infact have Muslim relatives. My maternal grandmother is a Muslim.

M.Hilli: If you dont mind me asking, what religion are you?

Ashita: No not at all, I am a Buddhist believer.

M.Hilli: really??? I am particularly interested in that religion. Give me a brief outline of what you believe.

Ashita: I believe in my own talents sums it up really?

M.Hilli: What about Siddharta the Buddha? Do you really worship him.

Ashita: We pay our respects to him. He protects us. My mother gave me a small statue of Buddha she told me to carry it with me wherever I go. It protects me from danger. I also feel my mothers protection. And I also can protect myself.

----the interview was interrupted after this--------------

Continuing from understanding dependancy on the opposite sex

Ive seen many couples, who when seperated are at great loss, they are unable to function well, although this may be my opinion, I feel that single parents, or couples that have split up are defensive about their position in the situation and always try and appear stronger than they are, I suppose its natural really for them to be like that... but how realistic are the

A healthy relationship is always based on a sufficient amount of give and take, to which each individual person feels satisfied or happy to the extent that allows them to appreciate their life. Many people tend to be very selfish and greedy in their relationships, they always want and want and want more and never give anything in return. A beautiful system of love allows us to want to share to give.. this beautiful system is so unique in its form that couples begin to be liable to change from it. It always takes a person you love, preferably dealing with straight love for the time being... a member of the opposite sex can always show you how to improve because they look at things from a different perspective to someone from your sex.

In addition, a person that you love will always be a person you listen to, and want to take advice from, its only natural for you to be more attentive. Therefore it is at this stage that we can say that we also depend on the opposite sex for our own development.

understanding dependancy on the opposite sex

I have always thought that men and women could live individually in this world without relying on others, and certainly not someone from the opposite gender. I believed the notion of "independant women" and how they managed perfectly without men. Lately I have come to realise that this is not so. Women need to depend on men at times, there always comes a time, when you need a man around, a basic example is if you are a mother who has kids, and your child falls terribly ill, as strong a mother as you may be you will not be able to handle the situation emotionally as well as the father of your child. Women need men to help them along with maintaining their confidence, the little comments we receive from men like "you look amazing" or "that was very thoughtful of you dear" or even "this dish youve cooked is very tasty" all these comments are a boost for our confidence as women, we love appreciation, we love gratitude, I mean who doesnt!!

Some may feel that the comments made above are sexist, or biased if anything, but I personally see that in an attempt to defame the uniqueness within each sex, and the appointed roles for them, people have gone to as far a means as they can just to make any specific roles as suitable for both sexes and that equality comes in that form, which is wrong!!

So far we have only spoken about women depending on men.. well as for the men, they cant escape that quickly from responsibilities... yessss they need us too!! believe it or not! They need a woman in terms of courage and confidence build, they need the soft affection and devotion, the dependancy we have on them, that form of bodily power they wish to posses. While we women are recognised as the main drivers of a relationship, we can say that men are the bodies..

A man needs to work around a caring and loving atmosphere which he helps to build, although love and affection can be achieved from family, it is never the same as the love and affection you get from a spouse because that love and affection is solely for you.

The intimate relationship between a man and a woman, sexually speaking creates a bond between the two, and bridges the gap of desires that the soul has cravings for. The spiritual uproot from such an act can create a strength in itself..

I will continue with this another time, as my eyelids are about to drop off..

Sunday, June 11, 2006

How do we show others their errors?

It is often difficult to show people their errors, to tell them what theyre doing is wrong, bad, etc etc.. There are people who do not liek ot accept their common mistakes, or when they hear of them they dismiss them, let them pass over their heads, some may even react in an angry defensive way..

Once upon a time, the grandchildren of the prophet of Islam, Hassan and Hussain were doing their abolutions (a ritual that is performed before prayers, involving washing the feet, hands, arms, face and scalp), when they came across an elderly man who was not performing his ablutions correctly, in order for them not to hurt his feeling, they decided to tell him to see who performed their abolutions more correctly, Hassan or Hussain? Each then performed his wudu (abolutions in arabic) in the best way possible. The man then realised his mistake and thanked the two youth for correcting him.

From this example we can see that there are ways to show people their errors without really hurting them or offending them.

Somtimes life requires you to be patient with others, to be tolerant with their ways, and little for little they end up learning their mistakes.. never give up on people, never stop loving them, always be there to serve them, teach them, love them, and protect them.. for why else are we representatives of god?

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Why i have faith in God

There are times when you feel frustrated, alone, sad, depressed, so negative about yourself, and you have no one to speak to, or those who you speak to dont seem to care or they dont understand, moreover they may not even be willing to understand. Yet.. when you sit alone and you pour your heart out to the nothingness around you and shed your tears in the silence around you, you feel this phemonemal that indicates you are not alone, a power that makes you feel, there is something or someone out there listening to you, someone who can hear you, someone who understands you, knows you, knows how you feel, the only one who can maybe help you.

Psychologically... you expect something to be there, you expect the comfort, even if its the comfort of your own self, so why not the comfort of the one you feel is watching you?

When you cry out to yourself, or speak out loud.. why do you do it? cannot your mind hear your speech inside itself, cannot your soul distinguish its own agony?

Do you call out because you want to be heard? Or because you know you are being heard, yet you are more used to direct open speech, rather than inner silent prayer?

I have but to look at nature and what its brought... to feel overwhelmed.. the sky as the greatest canopy of my life, with the sun as my source of light and energy.. the green of the trees, grass.. vines.. the fields and the mountains.. animals big and small.. land types.. climates.. the.. the.. the.. the list is endless..

I have named only 2 examples.. but for me.. they are sufficient for my beliefs..

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Giorgio vasari - Foundation of Florence

Giorgio Vasari - The Holy family

Giorgio Vasari - Palazzo Vecchio frescoes

Giorgio Vasari - Saint Famille

Giorgio Vasari


Italian painter, architect and biographer. He was born in Arezzo and trained in Florence, in the circle of Andrea del Sarto and his pupils Rosso and Pontormo, where, above all, he became a Michelangelo idolater. He spent his busy and productive life as a painter between Florence and Rome, but he was really a superb impresario rather than a painter himself and perhaps because of his gifts in this direction his work as an architect ranks much higher than his painting.
His principal paintings are in Florence (Palazzo Vecchio frescoes and in galleries) and Rome (Sala Regia in the Vatican and the so-called 100 days fresco in the Cancellaria) as well as in his own house in Arezzo, which is now a museum. He was however, important in the development of Counter-Reformation iconography, as in his Immaculate Conception (SS. Apostoli, Florence), and in elaborate allegories glorifying the Medici Grand Dukes.
As a painter, Vasari was one of the most prolific decorators of his period, but he is not now highly regarded, his work representing the most in-bred and affected kind of Mannerism. As an architect he has a higher reputation; his most important building is the Uffizi in Florence. He designed and decorated his own house in Arezzo. Vasari was also the first important collector of drawings, using them partly as research material for his biographies, for the insight they gave into the creative process.
Vasari's activities as painter and architect have been completely overshadowed by his role as the most important of all artistic biographers. His great book, generally referred to as Lives of the Artists, is not only the fundamental source of information on Italian Renaissance art, but also a key document in shaping attitudes about the period for centuries afterwards. (The book was first published in 1550 as Le Vite de' più eccelenti architetti, pittori, et scultori italiani - The Lives of the Most Eminent Italian Architects, Painters, and Sculptors; in 1568 he published a second, much enlargened edition, in which the painters are mentioned first in the title.)
Vasari wrote with a definite philosophy of art and art history. He believed that art is in the first instance imitation of nature and that progress in painting consists of the perfecting of the means of representation. He accepted the belief of Italian humanism that these had been taken to a high level of perfection in classical antiquity, that art had passed through a period of decline in the Middle Ages, and that it was revived and set once more on its true path by Giotto. The main theme of the Lives was to set forth the revival of arts in Tuscany by Giotto and Cimabue, its steady progress at the hands of such artists as Ghiberti, Brunelleschi, and Donatello, and its culmination with Leonardo, Raphael, and above all Michelangelo, whom Vasari idolized and whose biography was the only one of a living artist to appear in the first edition of his book (the second edition includes accounts of several artists then living, as well as Vasari's own auto-biography).
The idea of artistic progress he promulgated subsequently coloured most writing on the period. Although Vasari's testimony has often been impugned on particular points (see for example Andrea del Castagno and Andrea del Sarto), he gathered together an enormous amount of invaluable information and presented it in a lively style, full of memorable anecdotes. Moreover, his qualitative judgments have generally stood the test of time as well. His book became the model for artistic biographers in other countries, such as van Mander in the Netherlands, Palomino in Spain, and Sandrart in German

Saturday, May 20, 2006

The Da Vinci Site

Was Leonardo Da Vinci gay?

Did he have a son?

Leonardo Da vinci - St. John the Baptist

The battle of Marciano

DaVinci Decoded - On the Job: Maurizio Seracini, ’73

The security guard at Florence’s Palazzo Vecchio waves Maurizio Seracini through the door of the Salone dei Cinquecento (the Hall of the Five Hundred). Ahead of him, a busload of English tourists shuffle to a halt under the mural on the east wall. It is a hot, humid, late-summer Tuscan day and the Brits are beginning to wilt under the weight of packaged culture.
“This magnificent mural of the ‘Battle of Marciano in Val di Chiana’ was painted by Giorgio Vasari in 1563,” the tour guide intones. “Vasari reconstructed the hall for Cosimo de Medici, the ruler of Florence (1519-1574).” Seracini smiles benignly as he if he guards a secret.

And he does.

As they move on, he points to the top of the bloody battle scene where an anonymous Florentine foot soldier waves a green flag amid a surging phalanx of pike men. There is a phrase on the flag—the only writing in the whole mural. You can’t read it from the floor, but Seracini has photographed it from a scaffold.
“Cerca Trova,” he says quietly, then translates: “He who seeks, finds.”
It is a phrase aptly applied to Seracini. He is seeking the lost Leonardo Da Vinci mural of the Battle of Anghiari, unseen since the 1540s, which he believes is hidden behind this wall. If that is not challenging enough, he has also just completed a four-year exploration of Da Vinci’s painting, the “Adoration of the Magi,” and uncovered a series of magnificent Da Vinci drawings hidden for 500 years. As Dan Brown wrote in his blockbuster novel, The Da Vinci Code, “Italian art diagnostician Maurizio Seracini had unveiled the unsettling truth.”

Unsettling indeed.

Seracini has been a seeker since he graduated from UCSD’s Muir College in bioengineering in 1973. After he completed his postgraduate work in electronic engineering at Padua University in 1976, he set up his Florence-based company Editech (electronics, diagnostics and technology), in 1977. At first, the company was purely a medical diagnostic facility but Seracini soon began to apply his techniques to works of art in order to ascertain their age, history and authenticity. Within a few years, he had acquired a long list of clients and sold off the medical division. He has been challenging the art world with provable scientific data ever since.
Editech’s offices are on the Via dei Bardi a few minutes’ walk from the Ponte Vecchio over the River Arno, with its tourist shops and restaurants anarchically stacked like a child’s first Lego creation. Four-story Renaissance palazzos, now occupied by architects, bookmakers, artisan woodworkers and restorers, loom over a narrow street of rutted ancient flagstones, plagued by honking Vespas and the interminable rattle of three-wheeled trucks. Editech occupies the second floor of a palazzo built in the 1530s, two buildings down from where the movie Hannibal (as in Hannibal Lector) was filmed.

Like his career, Seracini’s offices display a convergence of Renaissance art and technology. Angels painted on the 20-foot-high vaulted ceiling hover benevolently over a half dozen international interns, working at a humming bank of computers, scanners and light boxes. In an adjacent room, a rainbow frieze of Renaissance coats of arms stand sentinel over a room stacked from floor to painted ceiling with 2,000 file boxes. Each contains the results of a clinical survey on a specific work of art. As well as diagnostics on 27 Caravaggio paintings and 33 Raphaels, the files range from detailed analyses on works in the Louvre to frescoes on the domed ceiling of the Hagia Sophia in Istanbul to paintings in the Museum of Catalonia in Barcelona.
Stacked around these files, on metal shelves and in corners and closets he has carefully stored the costly tools of his trade. They include echographs, radar with high frequency antennae, X-rays and stereomicroscopes. Seracini adapted each of these machines, and his passion for tinkering with the innards of diagnostic tools is matched only by his passion for Renaissance art. “I believed from the beginning, that the technology should go to the work of art and not the other way around,” he says. “And so I adapt a sort of laboratory around the work of art and analyze it.”
Seracini is a fourth-generation Florentine, whose father owned a legendary ice cream store and became vice president of the European handmade ice cream makers (gelato artigianale). When he arrived at UCSD in 1969, his family’s culinary skills garnered him a reputation as a cook, and he recalls preparing dishes for a number of professors including Piero Ariotti and Herbert Marcuse.
A member of the Italian national volleyball team in high school, Seracini was quickly snapped up by the neophyte Tritons and played for four years. (He recalls that when he was not studying, or on the volleyball courts, he would go spear fishing for his dinner in the kelp beds off La Jolla shores — adding a new dimension to the term Renaissance man.)

Seracini believes he got a worldview at UCSD that he would not have received at any other school. “Almost everything I learned at UCSD, I’ve been using since,” he says. As well as classes in bioengineering and applied mathematics, UCSD taught him a way of thinking outside the box, of blurring boundaries between disciplines.
He broadened his interdisciplinary studies when he took classes at UCLA with Carlo Pedretti, a Leonardo scholar who taught Renaissance art. His interest in applying engineering to art was further stimulated when he worked with John Asmus at the Cecil H. and Ida M. Green Institute of Geophysics and Planetary Physics (IGPP) on a research project developing a way to clean dirty marble surfaces using laser beams.
In 1975, while Seracini was still at the University of Padua, UCLA’s Pedretti approached him with a tempting proposition. Could he help solve a Da Vinci mystery? Seracini had learned to use ultrasound at UCSD and at a local hospital. Pedretti asked if technology could uncover any trace of the lost Da Vinci mural, the “Battle of Anghiari”, in the Hall of the Five Hundred.
The trail of Leonardo’s lost masterpiece is interwoven with the violent political intrigues of fifteenth and sixteenth century Florentine history. In 1494, Piero de Medici was expelled from the city during the invasion of Italy by the French king, Charles VIII. The Dominican priest Girolamo Savonarola seized the moment and proclaimed a republic.
According to Vasari, in his Lives of the Artists, “It was ordained by public decree that Leonardo should be employed to paint some fine work,” to celebrate the republic. “In 1503, the hall was allotted to him by Piero Soderini, the Gonfaloniere of justice. Leonardo began by drawing a cartoon ...” Da Vinci notes rather ominously in his own journal that he began to paint on June 6, 1505, just as a storm broke over the city and “great rain poured down until nightfall.”
We know the mural was still there in 1549, from a letter written by Anton Francesco Doni advising a friend who was traveling to Florence. “Having ascended the stairs of the Salone Grande, take a diligent view of a group of horses (a portion of Lionardo’s battle), which will appear a miraculous thing to you.”
However by the 1560s, the Medicis had returned to power and Cosimo Medici engaged Vasari to renovate the Hall of the Five Hundred and cover Da Vinci’s mural celebrating the republic. There is no mention of the “Battle of Anghiari” after 1563.
Enter Pedretti, Seracini and Asmus in 1975. With funds from the Kress and Armand Hammer foundations, they set about scanning the walls of the Salone dei Cinquecento with ultrasound. But because of a combination of limited technology and money, as well as the intrusions of local politics, the results were inconclusive (although tempting enough to convince Hammer to suggest that for a princely price the city remove the Vasari mural and see if Da Vinci’s mural was underneath).
Fast-forward 25 years. Seracini is now one of the most prominent experts in the science of art diagnostics with a worldwide reputation and a range of equipment in his arsenal. In a scene reminiscent of a Brown novel, a stranger walked into his office in 2000. “He said ‘good evening,’” Seracini recalls, “‘my name is Loel Guinness. I’m here to propose that you restart the Anghiari project and bring it to completion.’” Guinness, a member of the banking side of the Irish brewing family, said that his Kalpa Group would bankroll a new investigation of the Hall of the Five Hundred.
“Maurizio was looking for funding to carry out three-dimensional architectural diagnostics in the Hall of Five Hundred, using a range of non-invasive scientific techniques to probe the walls and floors,” says Loel Guinness. “The Kalpa Group is interested in unusual ways of thinking, ways that synthesize knowledge from very different fields. Maurizio’s work is one of those projects.”

Although his schedule was booked with clients ranging from Sotheby’s and Christie’s in New York and London, to Renaissance churches in hilltop Tuscan towns, Seracini did not hesitate to follow his passion. He set about planning his new search for the elusive Anghiari mural, reputedly three times the size of Da Vinci’s Last Supper.
After amassing a wealth of historical research from such Renaissance scholars as Professor Rab Hatfield from the University of Syracuse and Professor Martin Kemp from Oxford, he made a detailed architectural survey of the present-day building using laser scanners. Next he carried out a thermographic investigation, using a FLIRSytems Thermographic camera, which can detect radiation in the infrared range of the electromagnetic spectrum (roughly 900-10,0000 nanometers). Since the amount of radiation emitted by an object increases with temperature, thermography allows the viewer to see these variations in temperature, which in turn reveal different materials within the walls. This allowed him to uncover the architecture of the building in 1495 and trace its major renovations since that period (see illustration 3, page 30). Using the thermographic surveys, he calculated the height of the ceiling and the placement of the windows and doors in the period when Da Vinci was working in the hall.
“We knew that by the time Leonardo walked into the hall, in June 1505, two earlier windows were filled in,” Seracini recalls. “This meant Leonardo had the entire east wall at his disposal to paint.”
But Seracini further discovered that during the renovation of the hall in the early 1560s, Vasari raised the roof, added three large arched windows and ten small rectangular ones. Most important for the Da Vinci mural, Vasari built a brick wall over the eastern side of the building’s original stone wall, the one on which Da Vinci is reported to have painted his Battle of Anghiari.
Seracini had planned to develop a portable echograph for the east wall but did not have the funds, so he adapted a portable, ground-penetrating radar machine. “We used much higher frequencies, which meant less penetration,” says Seracini. “On the other hand, you got a much higher resolution, so you get better information over a shorter distance.”
Seracini discovered a gap, varying from 1- to 3-centimeters thick, between the newer brick wall and the original stone wall—a gap large enough to preserve a mural on the hidden, older wall.
“Vasari was a great admirer of Leonardo as we know from his Lives of the Artists, “ Seracini concludes. “And he would have had no reason whatsoever to destroy Leonardo’s mural. He had to place a wall in front of it since it represented a victory of the Republic of Florence.”
Professor Hatfield concurs with the results obtained during the surveys. “Seracini’s work with thermography reinforces my own conclusions,” Hatfield says. “And they also help me refine these conclusions.”
So is the mural still there behind this “new” Vasari wall?
It would seem that Seracini had gone about as far as he could, without unpeeling the Vasari mural and removing the wall that held it. Then last July he was asked to address a physics conference on “solid state imaging systems,” in Taormina, Sicily. Seracini’s genius is that he is constantly searching for new technologies and is undaunted by the challenge of fusing art and science. Although it was a long shot, he finished his lecture by posing his dilemma. Did they know of any new non-invasive method that could penetrate the walls and detect paint on the second wall behind the Vasari?
Professor Raymond DuVarney, chair of the physics department at Emory University, mused on the question overnight and woke up to a Eureka moment. “The next day I had this idea,” DuVarney says, “to use neutron activation and a gamma camera.” Neutron activation could penetrate the wall with gamma rays and then capture the returning rays with a gamma camera. “The intensity of the gamma ray will be proportional to the kind of pigment that is in various colors,” DuVarney explains. It is therefore hoped that as the camera scans the walls reading the returning gamma rays it will be able to trace out a black and white image of what is on the inner wall.
“This new approach is an example of the type of research that thinks outside the box,” says Kalpa’s Guinness. “It may get nowhere, but on the other hand, many developments in the past seemed ‘sci-fi’ until they were successful.”
Seracini’s Editech offices are in a constant flurry of activity. While he patiently explains his reams of research on the Hall of the Five Hundred, he fields calls from London’s Guardian newspaper, a French television station, and Horizonte, a German technical magazine. Then he sets out for an appointment across the River Arno with the organizing committee of a new Da Vinci exhibit to be opened in March 2006.
The media is always interested in his work, but this latest spurt of interview requests is because Seracini is about to lob another bomb into the world of Renaissance scholarship.
In essence: After four years of intensive detective work, uncovering original Da Vinci drawings, Seracini believes he can prove that Da Vinci did not paint the “Adoration of the Magi.” “Leonardo never meant the painting to look like this,” he says. “He left us just a drawing that was later covered by someone else.”
He crosses the river to the Uffizi gallery, where the “Adoration” hangs. He knows the history of virtually every palazzo, piazza, street and alley in the city. As he passes a construction dumpster outside a fifteenth century building advertising remodeled apartments, he erupts with barely concealed disdain. He runs his fingers along a discarded heap of narrow, 3-foot-long stone slabs and unpeels layers of plaster flakes. In delicate shades of blues and whites, the flakes represent the many layers of passing generations.
“This is what they used to fill in arches in the fifteenth and sixteenth century.” He shakes his head and hastily snaps a photo with his cell phone. “It is such a pity to see this thrown away. But they don’t care. What they call architectural restoration here, is sometimes really just demolition.”
Seracini feels he is in a constant battle to protect the city’s irreplaceable heritage from the development that threatens to destroy it. At the very least he insists on reminding Florentines of the treasures that still lie hidden behind the walls of their city. He passes the Palazzo dei Notai, which for centuries was the official building for the notaries of Florence. “Part of the property was sold to someone who wanted to open a restaurant. A restorer was called in and she asked me to look at the walls. What we found hidden behind plaster was a mural, the very first portrait of Dante Alighieri.” He shrugs. Despair, disbelief? Or is it the universal Italian gesture of whimsical acceptance?
Finding what is hidden. It is a motif, a ruling metaphor in his life.
Inside the Uffizi Gallery, Da Vinci’s “Adoration” is surrounded by an adoring crowd of tourists. Seracini shakes his head in frustration, as if he wants to share a secret with them but can’t. He steps back and quietly explains that the friars of San Donato in Florence asked Da Vinci to paint an altarpiece for their chapel, in 1481. Except for the mention by Vasari in 1568, the “painting” essentially disappeared until it turned up in the collection of Antonio D’Medici in 1621. “No one knows what happened to this painting,” Seracini says. “No one knows where it was and no one knew if he really finished it until we started investigating.”
He points at the dark brown wash that surrounds most of the area containing Mary, the child Jesus and the Magi. “There is a sequence of drawings underneath this brown top layer, which is a mix of carbon, bitumen, pine resin and shellac,” he says. “They have never been seen by anyone. It’s like discovering hundreds of drawings by Leonardo that nobody’s ever seen. And all this is in one painting hidden under the layers.”

Back behind the bank of computers at Editech, Seracini reveals these drawings, the result of four years’ work. First he explains how his investigation revealed that the 96 inch-square altarpiece was cheaply constructed of ten planks held together with iron bars and nails. “Probably the friars were not the richest or perhaps it was not a good relationship between them and Leonardo. Incidentally, we have records that he was paid initially with wine,” he says with a smile, “so that doesn’t sound like a good return.”
Using a portable X-ray fluorescence unit, he discovered that the wood was overlaid with a mixture of fibers and glue, then a layer of calcium sulfate (gesso, which is still a base for oil paintings) ground together with colored fibers, and finally another layer of finely ground gesso. So far so good, but examined under ultraviolet light, (see illustration 5, page 32 ) Seracini saw that the final layers of paint (what was previously thought to be painted by Da Vinci) had penetrated the base layers of gesso.
“The layer of the priming, covered by the layer of the sky, had time to age and dry and crack,” Seracini points to the image on the screen. “After that time, paint was added on top and sank into it. This is proof that the paint on top was not added right away. In other words, these phases happened through time, a long time. The paint dried and formed cracked layers and then was painted over and that paint sank in.”
Seracini began to suspect that something very special might be hidden under the monochrome surface. He recalls the excitement of finding himself alone in one of the studios at the Uffizi gallery. “So here I am, in a very small room, with a big painting. I’ve built myself this scanner, with an infrared camera mounted on it hooked up to a computer. And I’m taking a total of 2,400 shots, going up and down so as to create a mosaic.”
He stops as if once again absorbing the import of his discoveries. Then he leans into the computer screen again as he brings up the series of newly uncovered drawings. “This is Leonardo,” he stresses.” “A work being created by Leonardo.”
Other Renaissance scholars are equally convinced. “There is no case for thinking that the new aspects of the very first under drawings are by anyone other than Leonardo,” says Oxford University’s Professor Kemp. “They confirm that the innovatory dynamism of his drawings on paper was carried over into his designing of the surface of the panel. No earlier artist had used such a ‘brainstorming’ technique to develop a composition.”
And Professor Hatfield of Syracuse concludes that, “Seracini’s proposals about the “Adoration” are the most important contribution we have had on that great painting for a long, long time.”
So now Seracini has revealed the drawings hidden for 500 years. But why were they covered and by whom? He believes the brown wash was applied 50 or so years after Da Vinci. Hatfield is not so certain. “Seracini’s assertion that the dark brown paint seen in many places is the work of a later hand remains to be verified,” he says. Seracini hopes that further scientific work may yet uncover the answer, but until then we are in the speculative world of Dan Brown’s Code. Was Da Vinci’s work covered by someone else as an act of censure? Or did he paint over symbols and signs that he wanted or needed to keep secret?
So what next? What do you do for an encore if you’ve spent your life lobbing hi-tech grenades into the sacred temple of Renaissance scholarship? Seracini wants to teach others to do the same.
Loel Guinness sees a need that is not being met. “Maurizio Seracini is still pretty much a lone voice in this field,” says Loel Guinness. “Until art historians, curators and conservators accept that science has a role to play in their field, these techniques will not be developed as fast as they should. But maybe the increasingly exciting results of Seracini’s research will convince the profession to take this sort of work seriously.”
Seracini wants to fill that need and create an interdisciplinary institute, bringing electrical and bioengineering, chemistry and biochemistry together with art scholarship in the same classrooms.
“If this kind of scientific study can produce such an understanding of Leonardo,” he says, “then it is obvious how much we need a new breed of scientists to produce this kind of knowledge.”
Seracini sits back from the large computer screen and clicks the mouse. The tantalizing image of the green pennant in Vasari’s mural appears. “Cerca Trova.”
“He who seeks, finds.” It is very apt.

Leonardo Da vinci - "Adoration of the Magi"

Leonardo Da vinci - "The battle of Anghiari"

'I love you' is 8 letters long so is 'bullsh!t'

Friday, May 19, 2006

Advice for Women in relationships

The best way to get what you want out of life, if you are able to implement it.

1. If you have a husband/fiance or companion do not give them too much attention, because instead of appreciating it, it frustrates them, let them make the effort that way you wont be intruding on whatever it is that they are doing. Yes its about what you want to.. but in the long run it helps.

2. Think about your needs too, and dont always concentrate on the needs and wants of others, for if you do you will soon realise that you have not achieved anything in life, people dont tend to respect you even if youve offered pleasantries.

3. Dont be too nice and dont be too giving, people will never have a limit, and it will never be appreciated.

4. Expect nothing from people and you will never be disappointed.

5. Give and take, dont be too giving and dont be too stubborn, use your common sense and do what you believe is the best thing to do.

6. Never put anyone forward before everyone else, you end up with a pain in your heart that will be hard to alleviate alone.

7. Be practical in your expectations.

8. Concentrate on what you want out of a relationship and put your emotions to the side.

9. Set your priorities out infront of your partner from day one so that they dont get a nasty surprise.

10. Be firm in getting your point across if it means something to you.

11. If something is not right say so from the beginning, sort the problem then and there.

12. Try to understand the others point of view and give them a chance to express themselves before leaping into conclusions.

13. Use your brain and screw your heart.

14. Be sensible about things, reacting unnecessarily will never help you.

15. Patience is the key, but dont prolong the patience otherwise you will find yourself exploding..

Thats enough for now.. look out for more points to come later on..
What would you do if you woke up one day and felt that the thing you most adored in your life, the thing that meant the most to you, was infact nothing but a dream you had whisked up for yourself. You led yourself to believe in false hopes, falsehood itself just to satisfy some inner need.

There is so much to understand about each and every aspect in life, every concept, every thought, every idea, every reaction, every action..

But it is the way you look at it which determines how you will eventually contemplate it.

Grief and pain, are two things which are the most difficult to understand, but it is only those who have the power and the will who are able to overcome it, with strength and power like never before.

Monday, May 15, 2006

Why are us poets so sad and depressed most of the time?

This has always been a question in my mind, one I havent been able to answer. I realise finally that a poet has feelings, s/he is familiar with words to the degree of sensitivity.. everything around a poet touches him/her.

We feel the pain..

We feel the joy..

We live your moments how you would sense them..

People think we are depressed.. deary.. boring..

But..

We live happiness and joy better than its owners..

And we heal surrow with softness no medicine could be compared to..

A poet spends his/her life feeling the world from intricate angles, from every perspective, through every dimension..

We as poets realise the errors on earth.. and see that nothing can remedy these errors.. nothing but words..

In words.. will every lover drown..

"God" by Gibran Khalil Gibran

In the ancient days, when the first quiver of speech came to my lips, Iascended the holy mountain and spoke unto God, saying, "Master, I amthy slave. Thy hidden will is my law and I shall obey thee for ever more."

But God made no answer, and like a mighty tempest passed away.

And after a thousand years I ascended the holy mountain and again spokeunto God, saying, "Creator, I am thy creation. Out of clay hast thoufashioned me and to thee I owe mine all." And God made no answer, butlike a thousand swift wings passed away. And after a thousand years Iclimbed the holy mountain and spoke unto God again, saying, "Father, Iam thy son. In pity and love thou hast given me birth, and through loveand worship I shall inherit thy kingdom."

And God made no answer, and like the mist that veils the distant hills hepassed away. And after a thousand years I climbed the sacred mountain and againspoke unto God, saying, "My God, my aim and my fulfilment; I am thy yesterday and thou art my tomorrow. I am thy root inthe earth and thou art my flower in the sky, and together we grow before the face of the sun."

Then God leaned over me, and in my ears whispered words of sweetness,and even as the sea that enfoldeth a brook that runneth down to her, heenfolded me. And when I descended to the valleys and the plains Godwas there also.

"How i became a Madman" by Gibran Khalil Gibran

You ask me how I became a madman. It happened thus: One day, longbefore many gods were born, I woke from a deep sleep and found all mymasks were stolen -- the seven masks I have fashioned and worn in sevenlives ; I ran maskless through the crowded streets shouting,
"Thieves, thieves, the cursed thieves."
Men and women laughed at me and some ran to their houses in fear of me.
And when I reached the market place, a youth standing on a house-topcried, "He is a madman." I looked up to behold him; the sun kissed myown naked face for the first time. For the first time the sun kissed my ownnaked face and my soul was inflamed with love for the sun, and I wantedmy masks no more. And as if in a trance I cried, "Blessed, blessed are thethieves who stole my masks."
Thus I became a madman.
And I have found both freedom and safety in my madness; the freedom ofloneliness and the safety from being understood, for those whounderstand us enslave something in us. But let me not be too proud of mysafety. Even a Thief in a jail is safe from another thief.

Freedom

Freedom is something beautiful, something that is not to be taken away, but to be given. Freedom allows you to explore life, to explore the world, to act as you want to, to be allowed to wander in any direction you wish without a restriction, withour a barrier, without any force holding you back.

Freedom means that there is no ruler or follower, no giver or taker, no king or commoner.. it means being a man that lives by his own rules, a man who has the choice to act as he wishes without a peripheral influence.

It is something to die for, something to achieve, something to live by, win by, feel by..

A free nation is able to prosper, to succeed, to develop and grow, to see healthy generations, and to bring giants into the world..

To mend hearts..

To unite hearts..

Freedom is life.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

King Kafoor

Al-Mutanabi


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